24 premiere!

OK, here we go. Three minutes to seven. I've heard about "the first 10 minutes" so many times this weekend, I may just turn the TV off at 7:10. They've got a lot to live up to.

"The following takes place between 7 a.m. and 8 a.m." Not even Kieifer looks good in a big steel hard hat.

Hey, it's the principal from "Buffy." President Palmer's brother, for non-Buffsters out there.

And the President is down! The President is down! Actually, Dennis Haysbert (who plays Palmer) is starring in a new CBS show, "The Unit" that begins in March, so it's not a huuuuuuge surprise.

Um, it's 7:07 p.m. and my socks are still on. One dead President? Is that all they got? That doesn't even buy a cup of coffee these days. An ex-President, at that.

"My friend's brother works on that rig..." Yeah, I've got like a dozen buddies working on oil platforms in Alaska. Who doesn't? Oh, and it's definitely past 7:10 now.

Ohhh no you didn't! Sucker punch -- Michelle goes down at quarter past.

They say Michelle's dead. I'm not buying that -- Reiko Aylesworth doesn't have another show lined up.

On screen for five seconds and I like the new First Lady ("Martha Logan," played by Jean Smart) already: "I look like a wedding cake," dunk.

Using a cell phone in a helicopter? Suuuure. Don't even have to raise your voice.

"We're not going to make it! We're not at speed!"

And, um, smoke bombs under a helicopter? Repeat after me: "It's 24, don't think too much."

"Hold your fire Chloe!" That's so unfair. I guess only Jackie gets to shoot people.
And, it's 7:51 p.m. and we have our first torture scene. I should have had an over-under on that.

Is anyone keeping track of drinks here? Let's see: Car explosion, torture, many, many cell phones. I'm rounding it off to a pony keg. If anyone's actually playing, that second hour could be rough.

"Let's get one thing straight kid, the only reason you're still conscious is because I don't want to have to carry you." Line of the night. Who hasn't wanted to say that to a teenager?

I'm ticked we have seen Sean Astin yet. He's supposed to be the new CTU head. Typical government, bringing in a hobbit to run the agency. Total affirmative action hire.
We haven't seen Peter Weller yet either. Can't wait for superagent Jack Bauer vs. Robocop.

It's an hour after a former President of the United States was assasinated, and they've got the area cordoned off with flimsy plastic barriers (foreshadowing?) and they're not bothering to search vehicles entering the area. "It's 24, don't think too much."

Jack takes down a Secret Service agent. Chloe: "Don't worry, he's really good at this." Second-best line of the night.

Jack wanders right through the middle of hundreds of FBI agents. Nobody notices. Must be the aviator shades. No wonder they're coming
back in style.

Did I call the flimsy plastic barrier or what? Hee hee.

Chloe is such a hardened agent. She'd break if you tickled her hard.

Martha Logan for President! At last we'd have someone in the White House with ironclad deniability. "That's not what I heard!"

And, finally, the poison pill. Love it. Now if could just get a cougar to start stalking Derek...
Maybe on Monday! And we find out the (a) mole. We gotta get some better background checks on these guys.

That's it folks. Thanks for playing along (whenever you read this).